October is National Bullying Month: Protecting Your Child from Cyber Bullies
Bullying is as old as childhood — bigger kids taking lunch money, weaker kids getting beaten up on the playground or in the bathroom. As many as half of all kids are bullied at some point during their school years, and at least 10 percent are bullied on a regular basis.
Today, bullying has evolved with technology. Cyber bullies use email, instant messaging, weblogs and text messaging to spread rumors, insult and embarrass their victims. They can create bashing websites where kids can vote for the ugliest or fattest kid at school. They can send hundreds of hateful messages to your child’s cell phone. They can post insults and threats on social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter, and even steal passwords and take over your child’s social media accounts. Cyber bullies can also use blogs to damage other kids’ reputations. Some blogs skewer classmates by exposing intimate secrets, while others beam humiliating photos to hundreds of people in a single evening.
Cyber bullying statistics
According to recent surveys, about 20 to 30 percent of young people in grades four through high school have been the target of cyber bullies. Since cyber bullies can mask their identities with screen names and anonymous email addresses, victims often don’t know who the bully is or why they are being targeted. The affects of cyber bullying range from emotional distress to suicide.
Tips for keeping your child safe from cyber bullying
To keep your child safe from cyber bullying, experts offer the following strategies:
- Keep computers in a common room.
- Understand and monitor your child’s Internet use. Set limits on telephone and computer time.
- Discuss “netiquette” and online safety with your child, including a discussion about cyber bullying.
- Ask questions if your child seems upset after going online.
- Instruct your children to never give out passwords or PINs to friends.
- Tell children not to send messages when they are angry; they may regret it later.
- Instruct children to never say something in an email that they wouldn’t say to somebody’s face.
Signs of cyber bullying
Sometimes kids are reluctant to tell their parents about cyber bullying because they are afraid or embarrassed. Here is what to look for:
- Signs of emotional distress during or after using the Internet or cell phone
- Being protective or secretive about their online life
- Withdrawing from friends and/or avoiding social, group and school gatherings
- Changes in mood, behavior, sleep and appetite
What to do if your child is a victim of cyber bullying
If you discover your child is the victim of a cyber bully, here are some steps you can take to help handle the situation.
- Make sure your child knows that you offer unconditional support. Explain that if she is the target of cyber bullying, you want to work to have the bullying stop without making the situation worse.
- Many schools have protocols in place to deal with cyber bullying. Talk to your child about the course of action you want to take. Some kids may not want to go to the school principal for fear of being called a “tattler.”
- Many devices have settings that allow you to block emails, text messages or IMs from specific people.
- Tell them not to open, forward, read or respond to messages from cyber bullies.
- Save all messages as evidence.
- If your child is threatened with harm, you should notify the police.
Reviewed by: Patrick S. Pasquariello Jr., MD
Date: September 2012
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